Sunday, January 08, 2006
What’s goin on?
Right, so, blogging hasn’t been my strongest point these past few weeks. I’ve been meaning to write, even going so far as to put a few thoughts down on paper, but I actually written anything. Part of it was the fact that I had to upgrade my site (in case you saw all the weird code stuff a few days ago) part of it has been just finding my routine again. The holidays really threw me for a loop and I have been attempting to recover ever since.
So, the big news, I joined a gym. Yep! I’ve temporarily given up on bally dancing and joined a gym. I’m thinking I will still do the parade this year, it has always been a lot of fun and I get to hang out with some really cool people. Though I love belly dancing, and the classes have been a lot of fun, the last series wasn’t as fun as usual. My teacher has increased her class size so there is no longer any room to move around in the studio. Due to the large number of people and the lack of movement, I wasn’t getting the workout I really wanted. So, I’m giving it up for a bit. I figure I will go back, but right now I need more of a workout than I was getting. And she was raising her prices. The gym is much cheaper and I can go when ever I want. Which is cool.
We will see how long it lasts. I didn’t get into a contract, so if it turns out the gym really isn’t for me I can get out pretty easily. I went three times last week and really enjoyed each time. I’m starting to settle into it a little and I imagine that it will only get easier to go. Yeah!
My writing classes also started up this last week. I have a new teacher and am determined not to read anything she has written until after she is no longer my teacher. Not making the same mistake I made last time. Plus I have calmed down about my writing a bit. I think, being in class, I am pushed a lot to do things I am not always ready to do. I understand that I am there to learn about writing a good novel, but I also understand my limitations when it comes to writing. I can’t write the end when I haven’t written the beginning. I really enjoyed the class, I think I benefited from it a lot.
Work is also starting to get a little more intense. It seems that other people within our group think we don’t have enough to do. They have been getting together and making up more stuff for us to do. Unfortunately this doesn’t really work for us as we’ve already got a lot on our plates. At least I have a lot on my plate. And it is my plate they want to add to. I’m not sure who they think I am, superwoman or something, but I’m not. I’m not exactly sure what to do. I’ve already tried passing the work onto one of my co-workers (one who clearly hasn’t had enough to do in the past) but it’s not working. This person is shrugging off the work, not willing to take on anything new. It’s a new position for me to be in. Usually I am begging for work. Now I am trying to figure out how to get people to stop giving me work so I can catch my breath and get everything else done.
I’m sure it will all work out, but until I’ve got my routine back it will just take some time for me to get it all figured.
Tuesday, January 03, 2006
Happy New Year!
Whoopee! It’s finally 2006. The year of, well, I’m not sure yet. But I AM sure that this year will be exciting. I spent a little time over the weekend reflecting on what I have learned this last year.
I’ve learned that I cannot drink like I used to. Mostly because the affliction called “hangover” has finally caught up with me. I don’t remember getting hangovers when I was younger. I would spring back from a night of drinking and merrily go on my way. Not so now.
I’ve learned that Freeman can blow really cool fireballs, while his friends mostly set themselves on fire and then freak out because they’ve set themselves on fire.
I’ve learned that, though I love belly dance as something to do, I am not a “Belly dancer.” No public performances from me, thank you very much. Well, with the exception of the Solstice Parade.
I finally understand what I want from life. Now I just have to figure out if life wants the same thing from me.
I’ve been reminded, over and over, how loved I am. How lucky I am. And even though I’ve had crappy times that I would rather forget, the good times far outweigh those. I’ve been blessed with great friends that support me, a wonderful family that is always rooting for me and a fabulous boyfriend who treats me like a princess. Things are good.
Wednesday, December 28, 2005
Swimmin with the fishies…
For some reason I had very vivid dreams all night last night. I only remember one very clearly, and it was an amazing dream. I was living on an island, but it wasn’t a traditional island. It floated out in the ocean on top of the water, so you could actually swim under the island if you choose to. I was standing out on a dock, looking out at the blue expanse of the water. The sky was brilliant blue with a few wispy clouds hovering through the sky. The colors that I saw were ultra bright and vivid. The greens were truer, the flowers brighter, the whole island was more alive than any place I’d ever seen.
As I looked over the water I realized it was teaming with life. I could clearly see whales, dolphins and other fish swimming around in the water. I looked straight down and saw a giant whale gently floating beneath the island. Several of the dolphins were jumping near me, chattering to me, calling me to go swimming with them.
I jumped into the water and grabbed hold of one of the dolphin’s fins and it pulled me through the water. We swam for awhile, not really going anywhere, just enjoying the feeling of being alive and in the water.
Tuesday, December 27, 2005
Happy Holidays!
How do I begin to recount a week’s worth of adventure, excitement, and wonder? It feels like an insurmountable task. I’m not sure I feel up to it. But I will try none the less.
We were supposed to go to Crystal Mountain for the Holiday. Freeman’s brother had rented a “cabin” for the weekend. At one point there was to be 10 of us staying together. Needless to say I was very nervous about it. For some reason I had this horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach. I couldn’t really identify the feeling, but something with this trip made me uneasy. I didn’t want to go. I really didn’t want to go. It wasn’t his family. I’ve been together with them for extended periods of time before. I know what to expect. The adults drink and Ray runs circles around the living room. I didn’t think it was the family that was getting to me, but something was.
Fortunately it all worked out for the best. Frank (Freeman’s brother) and his wife Jenn came into town Wednesday night and headed to the mountain. They arrived to find the “cabin” too small and no snow on the mountain. It proceeded to rain all night, a nice warm rain, that sealed the deal. No skiing trip to Crystal Mountain this Christmas. Instead we’d go for plan ‘b’.
Frank and Jenn spent the night with Freeman and I in Ballard on Thursday. It was so much fun. I haven’t really spend a lot of time with Frank and Jenn with out the rest of the family present. We took them to the Jolly Roger, our favorite tavern in Ballard.
Friday we all headed down to Freeman’s mom’s house. We spent Friday and Saturday there. It was the usual Christmas shenanigans. Lots of food, enough for 2 families, and lots of drinking, games and chatting.
Sunday morning we headed to my mom’s for Christmas day. We all opened presents and enjoyed each other’s company. Then I opened the gift Freeman for me. I was shocked and amazed. I couldn’t believe it.
He got me a laptop.
A laptop people!
The very thing I need for my writing. The very thing I need to be able to take my story anywhere at anytime and write! I have so much work to do on my story and I have been so frustrated with not having it with me all the time…this is the best gift he could have given me. Even now my eyes tear up with the thought of being able to take it all with me.
For me, this Christmas has been very wonderful. I can’t believe how lucky I am.
Monday, December 19, 2005
Last night…
Freeman came running into the living room about 3:15 yesterday afternoon. He put on some hot water and told me to get some warm clothes on; we were going to the beach. And to the beach we went! Armed with a large mug of hot cocoa and warmly dressed against the cold, we headed to the beach with the camera in hand.
Freeman took these beautiful pictures as I sat and watched people.
There was a couple with a small child, probably 5 or so. The woman was playing with some electronic toy, the man and the child were running around the park, playing a game. I felt a little sorry for the woman, if it was indeed her child she was missing a very precious moment between father and son.
There was a couple standing on an outcropping farther down the beach. They stood, silhouetted against the darkening sky. It was a very romantic picture.
I watched other couple walk the beach, hand in hand. I listened to snippets of conversations. Loving conversations, worried voices, concerned responses, and a few angry people here and there. I watched people come to the waters edge, enamored by the sinking sun, cameras in hand like Freeman, snapping a moment in time.
I noticed that people are all too willing to leave right after the sun sets. As soon as the great ball of fire was below the horizon people left the beach. They left too early. My favorite part is right after the sun sets, when the clouds catch fire and look like molten gold. The colors settle into a pretty pink before turning blue. The sunset doesn’t end just because the sun has set.
I’m so glad that I am with someone who insists that we spend time watching the sun set and the sun rise. Someone who takes pleasure in nature, the simple things that cannot be recreated on a whim. It was a special moment.
As you wake in the morning
What do you feel?
Does a rush of happiness
wash over you when,
Suddenly, you realize you are alive?
